Appreciate them before they get bum fluff...

When they are babies you wait patiently.  In an eagerness to be closer you anticipate and long for their first words.  You day dream what they will be like; as toddlers running about splashing in mud, as children learning independence at school, and as teenager, (sigh) well, you worry putting it back in it's mental box marked Too far away to even think of.  But the expectation is preset, something you hear mum's say a lot jokingly is; "I don't know how I will cope when they are a teenager?".

 I have a theory about this parental angst.... NO ONE TELLS YOU THE TRUTH!! You're  prepared for the "terrible two's", and the adjustment of school life.  People talk about these stages freely.  You could say there are a number of factors for this. Children are scattered to  different secondary schools and  mums are no longer welcome at the school gate.  So the impromptu chats and friendly reassurance is taken from beneath your feet.  Every so often most mothers need to hear it's not just their children who are being a royal pain in the ass - and share tips/ reassure/ or just to talk on how to cope.   Yes you still see the lovely supportive mum's who have shared and watched your child or children grow, but it's not the same.  You can't put your heads together at the school gates and you can't fix their problems anymore.  In fact how would you really even know if there were any problems, no matter how small?  And I say this as a mother who prides herself on keeping communication non judgemental and open.  So all of a sudden you feel a little on your own.

The first few years of secondary school you see a change and you think this is it: the dreaded teens no one really talks about.  Just the roll of the eyes and the just you wait looks from parents who have gone through it already, tells you it's not.  Yes there is some stamping out of independence from the pre-teen but nothing is quite like telling a 6"2 fifteen year old who doesn't realise he is 6"2 and cumbersome to go to bed!!!    I know you have to let go, I understand this, but if it were left to him he would wallow in pj's, and play on playstation or youtube ALL day.  Resulting in sallow skin from lack of daylight, feeling unmotivated and bored, and quite frankly smelly!!

Where has my little one gone?  The child who picked me flowers, and the chubby hand which fitted perfectly in my palm? Will I ever get him back? - You know you have to let go but neither of you are quite ready.  The size of them (man/boy teen) is confusing, oh how I wish I had a small (in stature) child sometimes, looking more like a boy than a man would surely make unchartered waters easier to navigate?  The reality is teenage years are like being stuck in a dingy  knowing the shoreline is near but without having a compass, paddles or a survival guide, for the teenager more than the parent.

Wow... technology I win the first round!

Ok, I have done it.  I'm here...but it now feels like when you awkwardly arrive at a party that... well is ...a bit shit really. Not blogging, I love reading blogs, getting inspired, feeling positive and that the world is actually not a big place but a Ryanair flight from most places.

But you know what, I'm a blogger I've done it, and on very little sleep (currently in bed with greasy hair, big eye bags and a cold sore that won't go away), and it feels very nice to be here too, even though I realise I am actually twittering onto myself. So, unlike the "real" world where you might avoid the nutter talking to herself, come and have a:

• listen
• laugh
• joke
• comment

or all of the above, sharing is encouraged.